Free napoleon dynamite sayings and cute sayings

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   Death is God's way of telling you not to be such a wise guy.
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   Writing about music is like dancing about architecture.~Thelonius Monk
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   You're just jealous because my cereal only talks to me.
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   He who hesitates is probably right.
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   Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
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   My child was inmate of the month at the County Jail.
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   A fool and his money are a girl's best friend.
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   If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.
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   The smartest thing a man can say starts with, 'My wife says...'
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   How do we know God doesn't change his mind as much as we do?
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   Don't drink to drown your sorrow. Sorrow knows how to swim.
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   It is the first step that is difficult.
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   Pay good teachers good money
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   A little bit of powder, a little bit of paint, makes a girl's complexion seem what it ain't
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   There is much more here than what meets the eye.
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   I am sorry I offended you - I should have lied.
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   Heck is for people that don't believe in Gosh.
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   Sincerity is the key. If you can fake that, you've got it made.~George Burns
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   Save Your Breath – You’ll Need It To Blow Up Your Date!
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   In the beginning was the word. And the word was "Aardvark".
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   Why do they have handicapped parking in front of a gym?
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   The trouble with learning from experience is that the test comes first and the lesson afterwards.
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   The trouble with life is, you're half way through it before you realize it's a 'do it yourself' thing.
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   The food that you get in art museums is institutional revenge for the art that you get in restaurants.
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   Condoms are easier to change than diapers!
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